Dejavú (NaPoWriMo 2017 #4)

There’s a boy I used to love

A love I used to know

It all started at someone else’s garage

As children too old to play

Too young to date

We were playing games, literally

And shared donuts and two giant sodas with three straws

From our allowance money

This is how I learned my love of donuts and Sprite

We knew just how to be

Just how to pick up where we always left off

13, 14, 15, 16

Seventeen

Always the one to pick the right soda

Always the one to narrow the distance when adolescent angst and pride got in the way

He was caring, sharing, being the friend not expected to be

Loving timelessly

Even to the last encounter I remember

Before the ocean stood between us

Not making promises but keeping them anyway

Over time all I wanted was happiness,

His and mine

In whatever clichéd form that takes

Not too long ago, he found it finally with someone else

In my place from far away I learned a feeling I was not familiar with

To be both happily proud and sadly grieving

That perhaps I lost my great love to one greater than mine

As he made a promise I know he will never break

Then here you are

Throwing me in flashbacks

With the way you sit next to me every chance you get

The way you slow the pace to let me keep up

The way you close the distance in this dance

And how you keep promises even without making them

You are dejavú of a love I used to know

In the form of a boy I have yet to learn more about

And I again come across a feeling I am not familiar with

This hope that there is a greater love than the one I used to know,

That I can find in someone else.

Maybe in you.